No Chaser

Moisture

The rain and humidity have left Cornlandia a soggy mess, and the entire town smells of mildew.  Mold spreads its mantle across many leaves and other likely surfaces.  The skin of each resident plumps with that 24-hour steam bath youthfulness. 

When travelling across town by foot, one finds it wisest to plan several stops along the route -- public library, post office, Library Science building, university library -- in which to loiter, cool down, and dry off.  And when mildew threatens to attack one's very person, despite frequent showers throughout the day, a prolonged dip in the pool is recommended, chlorine bleach being a handy vanquisher of mildew and mold.

posted by: NoChaser at July 29, 2006 09:19 | link | comments |

Updated Links

I've been meaning to update my links for a while, ever since Clonk shut down his blog, so I've done it.  Some friends' blogs have been defunct for some time as well, so I've removed links to them.  Sorry guys.  If you start posting again, tell me, and I'll add you back on.  I've added new links to blogs I visit regularly, some of which belong to real-life friends, some to people I know only though their blogs, all of which I enjoy reading.   Check 'em out.

posted by: NoChaser at July 26, 2006 09:02 | link | comments (1) |

Ask not for whom the bell tolls . . .

Every Tuesday after work for the last couple of weeks, I and my fellow laborers have been regaled with song.  The bus stop where we congregate sits quite near the bell tower on campus, officially known as the Chime Tower. 

Not content with a simple bell tower, this university installed 15 bronze bells in the tower in 1920.  They are attached to a "keyboard" that looks like a row of waist-high wooden levers attached to wires that ring the bells.  There is a "chimesmaster" and two novice "chimesplayers," and they play every weekday from 12:50 to 1:00 with special concerts performed on a number of occasions during the school year.

One of those special days is Commencement, which is coming soon, and for which they must be practicing every Tuesday afternoon.   They play typical bell tower type tunes, such as the "Westminster Chime" along with the school fight song and the official state song (who knew there was one!?).  But, occasionally, they like to throw in a little something different. 

The song they are currently practicing, and playing quite poorly, is "Just a Gigolo," written and performed originally by Bing Crosby and re-popularized in the 80s by David Lee Roth.

posted by: NoChaser at July 26, 2006 08:49 | link | comments (1) |

The Tour concludes . . . now what?

The Tour has been a wonderful distraction and a really incredible race this year.  I never was a rabid Lance Armstrong supporter, and I must say the race has been much more interesting without him in it.  I would not be at all suprised if things get shaken up again today even though ideally everyone will ride into Paris drinking champagne, celebrating a race well-ridden and the imminent return to a more sedate existence.

Knowing it's the last day, I began poking around on the web to discover what local fun we can occupy ourselves with now that the long-distance distraction is ending.  At first glance, it's all pretty much your standard summer activites: county fairs, Shakespeare, music in the park.  But look a tad closer at each of these events, and you find a special Cornlandia quirk.

One of today's Music in the Park events includes a huge BBQ rib-fest, very nice for the carnivores of course, less appealing to me, and featuring a kind of jazz I find reprehensible.  They call it "smooth"; I think  "runny" is a better descriptor.  The other music event actually looks okay, and I should probably be thrilled that there are two options in a town this small, but I'm scared. 

We have seen (brief parts of) two Music in the Park events so far this summer.  The first featured a band that described itself as playing "Funk Hits of the 70s and 80s."  We were stuck at a huge event to see a friend perform on a different stage, so we though this band might provide an amusing way to pass the time.  But like so many things here -- the French Bread Pizza billed as "Panini" for example -- they didn't play what they claimed to play.  What they played, in fact, was disco, opening their set with a BeeGees number, followed closely by a KC (of KC & the Sunshine Band) song.   This bunch of beer-bellied, balding white guys in Hawaiian shirts were able musicians, but if you're going to play disco, please don't tell me you're going to play funk. 

We happened upon the second Music in the Park event while riding bikes home from the movies.   A group of six or seven satin-clad youth side-stepped back and forth and up and down a set of white bleachers while singing brightly bleached versions of such patriotic hits as Bruce Springsteen's "Glory Days" to an audience of senior citizens sitting on folding, plastic lawn chairs.  It was all very geriatric Republican cruise ship and still haunts me.

On to Shakespeare.  Being a Literature lover and a one-time thespian, I have seen a lot of summer Shakespeare -- in the Park, fancy Festivals, etc.  Even the somewhat pathetic attempts have been perfectly entertaining.  Much of it has been very good.  But, here in Cornlandia, they like to mess with the Bard, seemingly under the impression that simply doing Shakespeare makes their production important. 

We have seen one Shakespeare play here, dragged along by our Shakespearean scholar friends whose students put on productions twice a year.  The actors, some of the "cuter" English majors, pantomimed their way through a lot of dialogue they clearly didn't understand, enjoying primarily the multitude of ribald triple-entendres, which they acted with great gusto.  We tried very hard to stick it out, and despite feeling pleased that these students had taken the time to put on this play while their fellows spent their time drinking themselves stinko in a local bar or frathouse, we left after the third act, only to be scolded for it later by a senior faculty member who had witnessed our early departure.

Today's Cornlandia Shakepeare experiment involves a cast of five performing Romeo and Juliet in the abandoned theatre of our largely deserted local mall.   Romeo and Mercutio are played by one person, which I can only imagine as resulting in unintended hilarity.  It also bills itself as a "daring" and "radical" investigation of (how innovative!) suburban adolescence.  Shakespeare is wonderful, of course, but the last time he was daring and radical was around 1610.  After the publication of the First Folio in 1623, his work was pretty much past the whole fringe phase.  And don't give me your West Side Story argument, or I will rip it to shreds despite my undying love for Sondheim.

Sooo, that leaves us with the County Fair.  I am not a fan, in general, of county fairs.  Dirty, hot, crowded, they smell of sweat, manure, burnt sugar, and stale grease.  And, what do they offer aside from olfactory offense?  Classic rock cover bands, LeeAnn Rimes wannabes, depressed high school Fair Queens, oppressed farm animals in pens, vomit-inducing rickety rides, attractive crafts by local artisans who specialize in either airbrush t-shirts or quilted kleenex cozies.  And, the food -- the attraction most often cited as what lures attendees back each year -- appeals mainly to our baser Bourdainean instinct for a digestive challenge.

The Cornlandia County Fair features, in addition to the treats described above, several demolition derbies, a mini-rodeo, a motorcycle race, and a swine carcass auction.  Upon investigating the webpage for the local fair, which others have consistently told us we should check out, my sense is that I would be safer at Music in the Park.  Or, really, I may just have to skip the local offerings altogether and opt for the universal appeal of yet another summer blockbuster.

posted by: NoChaser at July 23, 2006 07:50 | link | comments (3) |

Confession

Although I am supposedly writing a novel in the morning hours these days, I am really spending approximately two hours each morning completely absorbed by le Tour de France live web coverage.  Because I have to wait for updates, I manage to get some emailing or some blog posting or calendar updating done, but no actual work.  It all must wait until about ten each morning when the race is over for the day.  And, now, we're in the last few kilometers of the first really intense hill stage, so I should get back to reading the updates.

Wheeeeee!

posted by: NoChaser at July 13, 2006 09:59 | link | comments (1) |

Ahhh . . . Sunday

Yesterday, Clonk and I drove to nearby large city and rode our tandem all along the waterfront.  Yes, my friends, there are lovely large bodies of water in the Midwest. 

The weather was low 80s with a slight breeze, and people were out in force, but mainly in a few patches, so the riding was for the most part very very good.  We parked far south and travelled far north to our favorite vegan restaurant, where we indulged in a yummy tofu sandwich with coleslaw (me) and an enormous seitan Reuben with a side of French Toast (Clonk!).  We opted out of the vegan milkshake although it was very tempting. 

I had brought my swimsuit, but the red flags were up yesterday for some reason, probably a gross bacteria that makes you itch.  Clonk suggested a shower at one of the beach shacks, but I opted for washing my face in the sink at Trader Joe's instead.  We rode 30 miles in all, that's 48 km to you Tour fans.   Consequently, today is a rest day.

The rest day has so far included a Tour update via the web, a delicious tofu scramble for breakfast, a nap on the floor with Mr. Bubble (Clonk), and a lounge on the couch with Monkey (me) while reading the last half of Craig Thompson's new book Carnet de Voyage. 

I really like Thompson's drawing, which is clean and pretty and makes everyone and everything look beautiful.  His stories are honest, sweet, and touching without being sappy or overly self-conscious.  This book is particularly interesting to me because I love travel journals, and he does a nice job documenting his loneliness, his excitement, his companions. 

What is most compelling for me in this book, though, is the way Thompson allows it to reveal the things that most inspire him to draw: trees, kitties, women, Gaudi.  Here is a comic artist obsessed with beauty rather than ugliness or harshness, and that's what makes him so rare and so wonderful to read.

The rest of the rest day will be spent watching the World Cup final and a certain new pirate movie.  Will we bike to those viewing destinations?  AAAArrrghhh!

posted by: NoChaser at July 09, 2006 09:22 | link | comments (2) |

Summer is . . .

Remember those Peanuts books from the 70s:  Happiness Is..., Love Is...?  They were black and white print on richly colored paper, very strange to the contemporary eye, but very cool back then.  Well, this installment of No Chaser -- in an updated aesthetic for your reading pleasure -- nods to those books with "Summer is . . ."

Summer is . . .
swimming
watching fireflies
watermelon and corn on the cob
the adolescent freedom of riding your bike all over town, even at night
laying around because it's too hot to do anything else
going to the movies for the air conditioning
tomatoes and basil from the garden
cocktails on the deck
berry picking

Yesterday afternoon, the Park Slopers, our favorite couple in town, invited us berry-picking.  I happen to love this activity as I spent many summers with my various relatives picking food out of their gardens or picking berries from the wild bushes across the street from their houses.  It was always a relaxing and meditative time for me, something extremely relieving in my turbulent youth. 

We drove up to the little organic farm, got our buckets, and dove in.  I picked black raspberries while Clonk went after the blueberries.  It was slow going with the raspberries, but totally worth it.  They have an amazing and unusual flavor, and while I was with Smelt on the Oregon Coast, we had an incredible black raspberry wine that made us cry, so the flavor brings all that back as well. 

Clonk then yanked up some huge stalks of rhubarb, and I investigated the herb patch.  In addition to the usual, they had some interesting stuff growing -- cinnamon basil, lovage, sorrel, burnet.  I had read about burnet, but never tried it.  I bit into a leaf; it tasted like concentrated lettuce and a bit like cucumber.  I snipped off a bunch and added it to my bag.

You see, I just bought some Hendrick's Gin, which has cucumber overtones.  I thought the burnet might make a good cocktail, and it did.  It also made the perfect ending to a long, hot, and relaxing day.  Drink these on the veranda.



Gin Burnet

several leaves of burnet (lovage or cilantro or celery leaves would be good too)
3 thin slices of cucumber (preferably organic and definitely unwaxed)
Hendrick's Gin
Mineral Water (Voss is close to tonic in flavor) or Tonic
Ice

Place the burnet leaves in the bottom of a glass and smash with the bottom of a citrus reamer, a pestle, or the bottom of a knife.  You just want to bruise the leaves and release the juice, not make pesto.  Take one of the cucumber slices and squeeze it tightly to release some juice in the glass.  Throw in some ice, pour over the gin and the mineral water and garnish with two more slices of cucumber. 

For a Rosy Burnet, add a splash of rosewater.

posted by: NoChaser at July 02, 2006 08:54 | link | comments (3) |